"Love" is a broad, loose term for several different patterns of behavior. These patterns belong mostly to the appetitive system and to surplus activity which is brought into its service, and they are all pleasurable, except under prolonged deprivation of objects. They are all learned patterns, to the extent at least of having discovered persons as sources of satisfaction and hence of having developed desires which have persons as objects. "Love" may be broken down and the elements classified in many different ways, with as much or as little detail as we wish. This writer has found helpful a simple analysis which considers first the feelings or emotional states which are involved in love experiences, and second, the objects and situations which arouse these feelings.
The first type of feeling we shall call tenderness. It seems to involve sensations arising from the skin, particularly that of the chest, face, and inner surface of the arms, 5 and its motor expression or drive is toward skin contacts with the object, with light pressure and slow gentle movements. The feelings involved in nursing or being nursed, cuddling, and the nonerotic kiss may be placed under this heading. These reactions form a group which is allied with the biological functions of feeding the infant and protecting the child or weaker person. Probably the feelings in the protégé or nursling are somewhat different from those in the protector or mother, and this might be the basis for a subclassification.
The second type of feeling is a very broad category which we may call joy. Its prototype is seen in the gleeful delight of the young child when surprised by finding a lost toy or a person who is playfully hiding from him. Feelings in this group do not seem to be tied up with skin sensations. They are aroused by visual and auditory perceptions and olfactory and muscular sensations; as personality develops, they become linked very much to mental images and ideas. Introspection does suggest a localization of joyful feelings in the interior of the chest and partly in the muscles. 6 A joyous person tends to breathe deeply and sometimes rapidly, and often feels a pleasant muscular urge to run and jump ("exultation," "going wild," etc.). Laughter, and even weeping, are other expressions. Some of these reactions, especially those which are called "excitement" (heart acceleration, etc.) belong to the defensive system. But they operate under such conditions that they are pleasant rather than disagreeable. Joy involves a great deal of random or surplus behavior. It is often an experience of sudden relief from anger, fear, or anguish, occurring when these defensive reactions have achieved a sudden success. The most intense joys are obtained by subjecting the organism to some form of tension or "suspense" with some unpleasant feelings, and then quickly changing the situation to one of pleasure-producing stimuli (the roller-coaster pattern). The sudden redirection of energy takes the form of laughter, shouting, dancing, and other surplus movements, sometimes weeping -- all quite pleasant.
When the source of joy is something upon which we must concentrate with eyes, ears, or thinking processes, the reaction is likely to be less violent in the muscular realm but perhaps even more intense as to visceral reactions or inner feelings. Of this character are the "serenity" and "ecstasy" of contemplating something beautiful or something totally satisfying to the whole personality. These feelings sometimes take the form of "thrills," which seem to be some kind of reaction in the chest or abdomen, often accompanied by a moderate muscular tonus and extreme alertness of the sense organs.
Feelings of the class called "joy" are especially characteristic of "romantic love." This supreme passion is a total love containing also tenderness, but with the latter held in leash. Quite significantly, romantic love is said to be in the heart. This writer elsewhere has called it "cardiac-respiratory love."
It is found in homesickness or nostalgia as well as in love of a person. This feeling is especially apt to be attached to a love-object of long acquaintance. We might call it "nostalgic love." Then there is a gay and playful feeling which enters into many, and perhaps at times all love relations. There is the calm pleasure which we call "sense of security" and which is commonly produced by the mere presence of friends, relatives, or persons upon whom we are dependent, without excitement or physical contact. There is the outburst of grateful feeling which occurs when the protector has rescued us when we were in fear or other suffering. There is the excitement of falling in love with a new person, and the deeper, richer excitement which occurs at the height of romantic love. It is impossible here to describe or classify all these types of joy adequately in terms of feeling; hence we have noted them partially in terms of the situations which commonly arouse them. We must remember, however, that the linkage of any feeling to any situation is a matter of individual learning. A description of a given situation or object may recall different feelings to different persons, while any carefully described feeling will not suggest the same situation or object to all persons.
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